Wednesday, July 16, 2008

David Caruso - WTF?

I should have posted this weeks ago. .... Subsequently, I have watched this about five times and showed it to friends and family. It is a compilation of the "best" of Horatio Cain's (played by the one and only David Caruso) dramatic one-liners right before the opening credits roll on "CSI: Miami". As it unfurls before you, it just builds and builds in absurdity.
No, it is not a Saturday Night Live skit (it is funnier than anything on SNL for about a decade).
This is the real thing. Be sure to stick with it to the end, because the final scenes are the best. Amazingly, Caruso delivers about 80% of his dialogue throughout each episode in the same dramatic, stilted manner. And it doesn't matter how important the dialogue is in any particular scene. ("Frank...excuse me [puts on shades]...I need to the restroom").
I know this because I have watched way more "CSI: Miami" than I ever wanted to. My usually sane wife absolutely loves this show.So, my question to you is this: is there a worse actor on television than David "Shades" Caruso?
Ultimately, if there is a God, we’d like all three CSI’s to crossover and implode upon themselves. The gravitational collapse would result in a black hole so massive it could accomodate the ego of David Caruso...
Quote of the day - Can you give one reason why David Caruso is allowed to keep acting? Wasn't he like the first person to show his naked ass on american tv?(

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